Just when you thought you were hurt enough….

So the other night like many others, the little one had her out burst about her homework and “no one will help her” which means no one will do it for her like she would like us to. She then decided she wanted to crochet (which I taught her a few days prior thinking it could be our special bonding time) which was fine up until she made the comment “I started a blanket with mom and it’s better than this one you taught me to do”. If that wasn’t a slap in the face, I felt so hurt so I made the decision to help myself relax and not let my feelings ruin the time and just picked up my phone to surf pinterest. When she went to bed, my fiance decided to dig in with “she wanted to crochet with you and you couldn’t put your phone down for five minutes”. I quickly reminded him of her comment. He told me he did care and that time was about her, which I agree, but when I get upset it’s usually better for everyone if I find something to occupy my mind rather than dwell at that moment.

This weekend I have had the time to think about that night as well as other night. Realizing that I really am not any type of priority to him, or though it seems. I went into this relationship knowing I will never be #1 which he made clear but I thought I would have some rank in his life. That same night he also told me that he doesn’t care about my feelings when it comes to his daughter. That hurt me a lot too. I don’t expect him to put me before his daughter but at least make me feel like he cares. Maybe I’m over thinking things but I feel defeated and like I’m alone in a relationship and little family we have. Guess I have a lot of thinking to do……

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2 thoughts on “Just when you thought you were hurt enough….

  1. I am sorry you were hurt. It stinks when that happens, and I have been on the losing side of those situations before. The only thing that helped us was marriage or pre-marriage counseling in your case. The biggest thing is whether he is willing to do it, it is usually a sign of how much a priority it is to make the relationship work. Think about it. It saved my relationship and I am happier now than I have ever been.

    Liked by 1 person

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